It’s the point!

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In 1993, my then-partner Stuart Maconie and I had a meeting in a loud Chinatown pub that’s since changed its name and become a gay bar (actually, maybe it was always a gay bar but we didn’t notice) with a gigantic, enterprising young television writer and an also-fairly-tall, equally enterprising comic actor, both in their early, postgraduate 20s. (We were both nearer to 30.) They had an idea for a radio show in which Stuart and I would play our broadcasting selves, or versions of our broadcasting selves, and the comic actor – whose name we took to be David Williams, but which he’d just changed to Walliams to avoid a clash at Equity – would play a parade of people who called in. It was a genial meeting. We were keen. We liked the men. They seemed to like us. The idea never went to the next stage, and other meetings and projects got in the way for all four of us. At the time, Stuart and I were most excited about having met the writer, Richard, who we discovered was the younger brother of Suede’s bassist Mat Osman. Mat was very much the famous Osman in 1993, and Stuart and I knew Suede well. Look! (Mat isn’t in this photo, but you get the gist of our familiarity with the younger, cooler, arseless gentlemen of Britain’s most happening band.)

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We crossed paths with the less famous, non-bass-playing Osman a year or so later, when we were put up for an audition by our new showbiz agent. This took place at the production company Heyland International, who made the computer game show GamesMaster and were looking for two new presenters for a similar but nightly show called GamesWorld. Richard worked there as a researcher – his first proper job in TV, I have since learned. If we took his presence as a lucky charm, we were wrong to do so. We gave it our best shot, commentating on some gameplay, but even though Stuart and I loved playing on the NES in my flat, we were out of depth.

All of which makes me feel a lot older, and dovetails nicely into an appreciation of Pointless, the BBC daytime quiz show that has recently passed its 1,000th edition and leaves all other daytime quiz shows in the dust. While surely nobody could object to the ease with which Alexander (“Xander”) Armstrong has slipped into the role of quiz show host, it is the high regard and public profile Pointless has bestowed upon Richard Osman that is its most important and unexpected achievement. He was, after all, a backroom boy at Endemol UK, the production company which conceived the format and according to origins fable only filled in as co-presenter in a demo for the BBC. (Execs liked him so much, they commissioned him into the format. Had he not been, he would still be one of the six who can lay claim to the format.) Quiz show hosts are traditionally drawn from the pool of recognisable entertainment figures, usually comic – think of Bob Monkhouse, Terry Wogan, Les Dawson, Bruce Forsyth, Lily Savage, Chris Tarrant, Bradley Walsh and even, latterly, Mark Williams and Mark Benton – but in the case of Pointless, a star has been born.

I have my Mum and Dad to thank for getting me hooked on Pointless. Each time I go back to Northampton to visit them and stay overnight, I willingly succumb to their routine of catching up with their favourite shows, which includes Pointless, The Chase and Only Connect, but it’s the former that proved the revelation. Its low-key geniality is deceptive; this is a true test of general knowledge in pairs and singly that’s about so much more than getting the “right” answer. While the early rounds, which eliminate two out of the four opening pairs of pals, siblings, relatives and partners, can be built around a straightforward binary right-or-wrong answer to the clue, anagram or picture, the best are those that offer up a potential pool of answers, such as US Presidents whose surname comes alphabetically between Bush and Reagan. The “pointless” part is the pivot – indeed, its “point”; whatever the composition of each round (or “pass”), the more obscure your answer, the less points you notch up.

I have been attached to Pointless for a long time now – although I cannot claim to have been in at the ground floor (a claim I cannot make for The Great British Bake Off, or Masterchef: The Professionals either, but both became staples once I saw the light) – and once you’re in, there are repeats and Celebrities editions to catch up with. It’s the gift that goes on giving. While it’s fun to see the celebrities paired up in themed shows, it’s the civilian shows that really describe the comfort and joy of the format. As the world gets darker – and I can’t remember a time since the 80s when it felt so irredeemably insane – Pointless becomes ever more of a beacon.

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It’s eight affable people who, whether academic or self-taught, take sufficient note of the world around them to take an educated guess at some assorted subjects (“Words” “Famous People” “Countries”), be they celebrities or non-celebrities – and in fact, the non-celebrities are nearly always more impressive, if not, in the case of sportspeople, more competitive. (Rhona Cameron is one of very few celebs to actually embarrass themselves on the show by being too triumphant, and for failing to stay on her mark.) When Pointless began, in 2009, the world was a much happier place. As events have ground grimly on in the intervening years, its place in the world seems ever more vital to our sanity. Even after a hard day at the coalface of sanity in the face of almost insurmountable vulgarity, avarice and violence, Pointless calms the nerves. The banter between Armstrong and Osman – warm, spontaneous, genuine, without malice – is a balm for a broken world.

The duo are co-hosting this year’s Radio Times Covers Party next week. After the ceremony, I shall be accosting that young researcher in person and volunteering for the next Pointless Celebrities with a radio theme. I got two pointless answers in the final last night – cast members of the film Rush.

If only Osman and Armstrong could co-host Earth.

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10 thoughts on “It’s the point!

  1. Wait, what, no video? I got all excited about seeing you on my screen talking up TV again when I saw the email alert. The blog post is nice, but can we expect you back on YouTube again soon with your carefully chosen piece of memorabilia on the coffee table?

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    • Sorry. No immediate plans for getting back on YouTube. UKTV contracted me for six months, and those six months were up at Christmas. I hope the written blogs will offer some solace in the meantime, but we’re all going to have to be patient. Telly Addict costs money to produce, at the professional standard you’ve come to expect, so I can’t do it without a patron with a budget.

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  2. Hi Andrew, good to see that your blog is back even if UKTV haven’t yet renewed the videos. Hopefully they’ll see sense soon. Alternatively, have you pitched it to BBC3, it seems one of the kinds of thing that they are making now?

    Haven’t really been a fan of Pointless myself (though I enjoyed a couple of the sports-focused special episodes), though like you my folks are big fans (perhaps there is something about living in Northampton).

    A recommendation, in case you missed it, for Sounds of the Musicals, another of the excellent Neil Brand’s series. I haven’t yet caught up with the last episode from Friday, but the first two were excellent, and still available on the iplayer, i think. The second episode covered things like Cabaret, and West Side Story, which seems particularly topical this week.

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    • It’s not mine to pitch until UKTV have officially passed on it, which they haven’t. So here’s hoping. I thought The Sound of Musicals was exceptional – although predictably so, as I’ve long admired the work of Neil Brand. He’s an “expert” who has the knack of a great teacher – you never feel spoken down to by him, regardless of his great skill and experience in his chosen fields. He’s a sharer, and a fan.

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  3. POINTLESS helped me integrate back into the UK after a goodly few years away. Just loved the fact there was a show that had niceness and decency at its core. Strong feeling that both these virtues were brought to the table by Osman himself. Richard Osman also gives very good chat in interview and Q&A sessions. Have seen a few Edinburgh Telly talks that he does where he shows a knack for being a great listener, and someone genuinely able to question the person being interviewed, in a way that adds real depth and insight to the conversation. He also is rather endearingly introduced on Radio 5’s Fighting Talk to the tune of Ian Dury’s Billericay Dickie, because he’s doing ‘rather well’.

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